Do you know someone like this?

[Katherine]

Laura, I hope you dont feel shy with us! I married a painfully shy man, who never said a thing for days. With two talkative daughters and me, the poor man has to fight now to get a word in edgewise, lol.

I think the eye contact part of conversation is just VERY difficult for many people. I am sure my lovely old physiol prof, who everyone loved, (he was also killingly funny, but thats sort of at odds with being shy) was just very shy, as you say. He definetely hated confrontation with aggressive students, and perhaps he dealt with that by closing his eyes. It was odd, but as I said, it didnt stop him from being an excellent teacher.

kat

[Trailblaze1]

Ten or so years ago, I found myself frequently visiting a zen center in Ottawa, cuz I enjoyed the quiet, and there was a nun there I liked to take tea with afterwards.

Well, the guy Sensei (means "teacher") and leader of this center, gave small group lessons on meditation. In doing so, he asked us to never "fix" his face or eyes with our eyes, but rather, try to take in his entire presence, let our eyes relax, roam over a wider area than just his face. I had to agree with him that some people, when speaking in conversation, bore into you with their eyes.....which is to me almost worse than those who close their eyes for a minute or more when talking.

Different strokes for different folks.